This upsets me because part of me is like ??? It’s literally just a floating pineapple. But the other part of me is like !!! Wherever this is looks so pretty i just wanna be there drinking something colorful and cold and enjoying the floating pineapples and swimming. Sigh
Disappointing Popsicle Jokes
robert downey jr. has become aware that chris evans has the shoulder-to-waist ratio of a dorito and i am kneeling on the floor in the shards of my life, clutching a comically inadequate gluestick.
I hate when people say someone has “the perfect amount of tattoos” because like Patrick Stump has the perfect amount of tattoos, but so does Andy Hurley… see my point?
when you drink the water and the tummy go sploosh sploosh
i love being naked but i hate how i look naked
(There’s a small pause at the start.)